BUILDING YOUR VOCABULARY: SYNONYMS 1

A SYNONYM is a word or phrase that means exactly or nearly the same as another word or phrase in the same language,

The exercise is designed to help you prepare for the verbal and written sections of many assessment and entrance exams. By completing the exercises you will also increase your vocabulary and refine your knowledge of words.

Which of these words is closest in meaning to the word provided?

1.  REMOTE:       A. Automatic      B. Distant            C. Savage             D. Mean

2. DETEST:           A. Argue               B. Hate                 C. Discover          D. Reveal

3. GRACIOUS:    A. Pretty              B. Clever              C. Pleasant          D. Present

4. PREDICT:         A. foretell            B. decide             C. prevent           D. discover

5. PENSIVE:         A. oppressed     B. caged               C. thoughtful     D. happy

6. BANISH:          A. exile                 B. hate                  C. fade                  D. clean

7. FRAUD:           A. malcontent   B. argument       C. imposter         D. clown

8. JOVIAL:            A. incredulous   B. merry               C. revolting         D. dizzy

9. INDIFFERENT: A. neutral          B. unkind             C. precious          D. mean

10. SIMULATE: A. excite              B. imitate             C. trick                  D. dislike

11. CHARISMA:   A. ghost               B. force                 C. charm              D. courage

12. APPORTION: A. divide            B. decide             C. cut                     D. squabble

13. GENERIC:     A. general           B. cheap               C. fresh                D. elderly

14. QUALM:       A. distress           B. impunity         C. persevere      D. scruple

15. REVERIE:       A. sadness          B. enjoyment    C. daydream      D. curio

ANSWERS

1.            B. Remote means faraway, or distant.

2.            B. To detest means to feel intense or violent dislike, or to hate.

3.            C. Gracious means to be pleasant or considerate in social interactions.

4.            A. To predict means to declare in advance or to foretell.

5.            C. Pensive means moodily or dreamily thoughtful.

6.            A. To banish means to drive out from home or country, or to exile.

7.            C. A fraud is someone who is not what he or she pretends to be, or an imposter.

8.            B. Jovial means good humoured or merry

9.            A. To be indifferent is to be marked by impartiality or to be neutral

10.          B. To simulate is to assume the outward appearance of, or to imitate

11.          C. Charisma is magnetic charm or appeal

12.          A. To apportion is to divide and share out

13.          A. Generic means having the characteristic of a whole group, or general

14.          D. A qualm is a feeling of uneasiness about a moral issue, or a scruple

15.          C. A reverie means the state of being lost in thought, or a daydream

AMAZING WAYS TO CHALLENGING OUR OWN BEHAVIOURS

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Road to Commitment

“We create our fate every day . . . most of the ills we suffer from are directly traceable to our own behavior.” ― Henry Miller

No matter how committed one is to a particular course of action or set of values, often our own behaviours get in the way. In effect, we might want something but actually do the very things that stop us achieving it. A good example from daily life is the commitment we make to go on a diet after the excesses of the festive season, only to have our ambition thwarted as we reach for one of our favourite eats.

Leaders can behave in a similar fashion in their professional roles. For instance, a school leader might be committed to the principle that each child should be treated with respect. Yet, when he or she sees colleagues treating pupils without due respect, the school leader ignores the behaviours, even though they run counter to his or her belief system. According to Kegan and Laskow Lahey – in their book The Way We Talk Can Change The Way We Work – these situations can arise because there is a competing commitment working in opposition to the original one. In this case, it might be that the leader wants to :

  • be seen as a supporter of colleagues.
  • avoid confrontation.

In a sense, the competing commitment trumps the original one. And of course, behind this competing commitment is usually an assumption. For instance, in this case, it is that if the school leader challenges colleagues over their disrespectful treatment of children then some or all of the following might happen:

  • Colleagues’ goodwill will be lost.
  • Colleagues’ respect for the leader will go.

Thus, the team spirit that the leader has so carefully built up will be damaged.

This paradox of the leader’s competing behaviour can be seen in a four-part Competing Commitments grid chart identifying four key scenarios:

1. Commitment

I am committed to the value or the importance of . . . the principle that each child should be treated with respect.

Now consider these scenarios  . . .

  • What I’m doing or not doing that prevents my commitment from being fully realized.
  • When I see colleagues treating pupils without due respect, I ignore the behaviours, even though they run counter to my belief system.

2. Competing Commitments

I may also be committed to . . . being seen as a supporter of colleagues avoiding confrontation at all costs.

3. Big Assumption

I assume that if . . . I challenge colleagues over their disrespectful treatment of children, then some or all of the following might happen:

  • colleagues’ goodwill will be lost.
  • colleagues’ respect for me as a leader will go.
  • the team spirit that I have so carefully built up will be damaged.

The authors recommend a four-step process to overcome our BIG ASSUMPTIONS:

  1. Observe ourselves in relation to the big assumption.
  2. Actively look for experiences that cast doubt on the big assumption.
  3. Explore the history of the big assumption; and
  4. Design and run a safe, modest test of the big assumption.

In essence, our actions can run counter to our original commitment. Indeed, our actions themselves can be based on a counter-commitment behind which is a big assumption. Only by first addressing our big assumptions can we start changing our behaviours in order to align them with our original number 1 beliefs and commitments.

red-outside-grass-sport.jpgFrom Kegan and Laskow Lahey’s work, it is clear that we have to attack both our assumptions and our competing commitments in order to stop sabotaging our own principles and beliefs. In the example teased out above, this might be about questioning the big assumption and/or developing different strategies.

For instance:

  • Is it really true that colleagues’ goodwill will be lost or respect will go or the team spirit will be damaged?

Or it might be about:

  • Can I come up with strategies that will keep colleagues on board with me and still allow me to remain true to my principles?

Or it could be:

  • I must remain true to my principles and not let my behaviours impede what is important.

This process does not necessarily lead to easy answers. However, it does let us reflect deeply on our own behaviours and actions and how they can get in the way of what is important for an individual, colleagues and the organization as a whole.

Challenging Oneself

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The Challenge

Molly Cain, writing for Forbes, has identified six Ways To Achieve Any Goal 

LOOK AT IT: A goal that you can actually see is massively more powerful than a goal you write down on a checklist.

TELL PEOPLE: Making yourself accountable to your friends and family is one of the best ways to reach your goals. Sure, it’s uncomfortable to share your setbacks. But when you do, you’re going to get emails from friends who have experienced the same and they’ll get your mind back on track. And when you tell them about the milestones you reach, you’re going to get applause from people wishing they were you and reaching those same goals too.

When you tell people your goals, they will jump in the boat with you and help you get there. You will be shocked by the support you’ll get from your network. You’ll be even more surprised by the people who come out of the woodwork to join you in your journey or privately cheer you on, knowing what you’re going through.

BREAK IT UP: Many people abandon goals because they’re just too dang big. If you’ve done this to yourself, stop now. Change your game plan. The best way is to break it up into bite-sized chunks.

Select milestones to get there and make each of those a tiny goal. Breaking your big goal into small ones will make it a more feasible option for you.

SET A DATE: One of the best ways to knock out a goal is to put it on your calendar. If you put a stake in the ground and impose a date on yourself, you’re much more likely to reach it.

BE REALISTIC: I’m sure if I asked everyone here, you’d all be just as interested in magically obtaining a bazillion dollars or finding the cure for cancer as I would. But there are some goals that are just too out of this world.. Simple but true…you’re more likely to reach goals that you realistically set for yourself. Don’t set yourself up for failure by letting your dreams get bigger than your abilities. That’s not to say don’t set high goals for yourself, just make sure they’re attainable.

COMMIT TO YOURSELF: Hey folks, there’s only one person in this goal-setting process that matters. You! You’re the one who has to put the hours in the work.

  • You’re the one who needs to stay late at the office to finish that task for your boss so you can score the promotion.
  • You’re the only one receiving the paycheck that will eventually pay you out of credit card debt. It’s all on you, my dear friend.

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Committing Yourself

There’s a great quote out there that says: “It’s funny how day by day, nothing changes but when you look back everything is different.”

It is really a paradox that one year from now, you’ll be one year older, no matter what. What can you do with your goals today that will make looking back to today feel really different and really satisfying?

Commit to yourself and then re-commit yourself each time you fall because that definitely happens along the way.

Our commitment to change is often canceled by another commitment we hold that has the effect of preventing the change.

pexels-photo-943747.jpegHowever, when all is said and done, the only person with that commitment is YOU. This is the only way you can challenge your own behaviours. Hence, CHALLENGE YOURSELF first!

Good luck in all your endeavours.

As of old: Be EMPOWERED and EXCEL.

EFFECTIVE TECHNIQUES TO MENTORING INDIVIDUALS @ High School

Mentoring is a process in which a qualified professional provides advice, support, and guidance to an individual or group in order to aid in their learning and growth. The mentor serves as a guide, advisor, or counsellor, sharing expertise, experiences, and skills with a trainee or junior within agreed-upon parameters so that the words of wisdom can help in the professional career of the trainee or junior.

It might be a short-term or long-term commitment, depending on the cause for the mentorship:

  • A MENTOR has the responsibility of offering support to and feedback on the individual under supervision.”
  • A MENTOR is someone who contributes their knowledge, skills, and/or experience to assist others in developing and growing.

Mentoring is frequently longer-term, with some mentoring relationships lasting 6 months or more, and mentoring can span years or even decades in some circumstances.

One of the most distinguishing features is that mentoring is directed, whereas coaching is non-directive. In practice, what does this mean? In mentoring meetings, the mentor is likely to do the majority of the talking, whereas in coaching, the coach is likely to pose questions and give the person they are coaching space to reflect and do the majority of the talking.

Finally, both coaching and mentoring are about allowing people to go to where they want to go by utilizing the coach’s or mentor’s experience.

The Skills Required for Mentoring

The 3 C’s of successful and effective mentoring programmes are based around the following principles: Clarity, Communication and Commitment. …

For mentoring, whilst qualifications aren’t required, there are lots of skills that are recommended for someone to be an effective mentor. Here are just some of them:

  • A keen interest in helping others is a given but we hope you’ll have that – it’s a key place to start when mentoring people.
  • First-hand experience, knowledge, and insights in the area in which you’re providing mentoring – because mentoring should be built on solid and concrete advice and guidance.
  • Relationship building and interpersonal skills are crucial for mentoring – they’re also important for coaching.
  • Dedicated long-term time commitment whilst not potentially considered a ‘skill’ is important because if you start a mentoring journey with someone, it’s vital to see it through.
  • Motivating, encouraging, and inspiring energy throughout all mentoring meetings.
  • Helping to identify the mentee’s goals is crucial. This can take some self-reflection from the mentor, in order to help the mentee and work out where their goals should be.

The benefits of mentoring are well known: It gives less experienced employees valuable feedback, insight and support, while passing down wisdom and institutional knowledge

Choices

When deciding whether to use a coach or a mentor, consider the goal you wish to achieve. The coach and the mentor will help professionals in different ways to accomplish their goals. In fact, some professionals use multiple coaches or multiple mentors throughout their careers, depending on their desired goals. In both coaching and mentoring, trust, respect and confidentiality are at the forefront of the relationship

REMEMBER . . . .

Being involved in a coaching or mentoring relationship can enhance your professional and personal life in ways that you could not achieve on your own. Keep your mind open to the possibilities. When you have been coached and mentored, then you can pay it forward by coaching or mentoring others. Take what you have learned and pass it along to those who can benefit from your knowledge and experience.

Techniques of Mentoring

Mentoring is a voluntary arrangement where both the mentor and the mentee are eager to build a viable relationship. The numerous mentoring techniques used by a mentor are described below

1. Group Mentoring Technique – This type of mentoring procedure involves the participation of one or more than one mentor for a group of mentees. Schools generally encourage group mentoring as there is not enough time and resources for undertaking a one-on-one mentoring program for all the children.

2. Peer Mentoring Technique – In this mentoring technique a peer addresses an individual or a group by sharing his experience so that it can help others to make necessary adjustments

3. One-On-One Mentoring Technique – In this type of mentoring only the mentor and mentee are involved. The young mentee works with an experienced individual and gains from his wisdom and know-how.

4. E-Mentoring Technique – With advancements in technology, the mentorship programs have also undergone a revamp. It is now possible to participate in the e-mentoring method by connecting virtually without even losing the personal touch.

5. Speed Mentoring Technique – The speed mentoring technique is usually followed during events and conference where the mentee has the chance to interact with several mentors in short time

6. Formal Mentoring Technique – The formal mentoring technique includes structured programs that offer accountability based on the formal contract between the mentor and mentee. It helps to boost confidence among the mentees and increase their performance levels.

7. Informal Mentoring Technique – This type of mentoring technique lacks a proper structure. It tends to be voluntary without any pressure of doing something in a set manner. Mentees seem to develop a strong connection with their mentor during the informal mentoring

8. Training-Based Mentoring Technique – In this type of mentoring technique, a mentor is assigned explicitly to a mentee. He assists in developing the required competencies, skills and knowledge in a specific field in which the mentee has enrolled himself.

Qualities Of A Good Mentor

The qualities that make a good mentor are as follows:

Willingness to assist others in succeedingEthical behaviourEmpathetic behaviourTrustworthiness
Willingness to listen with patiencePatienceStrong initiativeOpenness
Willingness to work with othersCommitment to the professional growth of the menteesThe right amount of self-confidence to make a differencePeople management skills
No biasHonestyCommon senseLeadership skills
Desire to motivate othersSelf-awarenessCommunication skillsQuestioning and answering skills
Desire to pass on  skills, know-how and expertiseWillingness to receive and give feedback with enthusiasmWillingness to learn and pass on the knowledgeWillingness to engage with others on an interpersonal level
FlexibilityRealistic expectationsKnowledge of a specific fieldSensitivity towards the mentee’s situation
Maintaining the levels of objectivity

The New Opportunities 

There are new opportunities for the mentees where they can develop their skills and boost their know-how. Being mentored is a privilege that everyone does not have. The support and encouraged broadens horizons and instils self-confidence as ….

  • Mentoring is a two-way street where the beneficiaries are both the involved parties the mentor and the mentee.
  • The mentor achieves personal satisfaction by sharing his skills and know-how with a willing individual.
  • He gains recognition as a viable leader and expert, and this boosts his professional credibility in the organization
  • While mentoring, the mentor comes to know about the ideas and concepts of the new generation. He gains a fresh perspective that helps him in personal growth
  • The mentor gets an opportunity to reflect on his practices and goals and make changes in his life if necessary
  • Every individual is different, and when the mentor comes into contact with the mindset of diverse mentees, he can regroup and develop the most suitable coaching and mentoring style
  • Mentoring for a mentor is an extension of his professional development record

Disadvantages Of Mentoring

The big disadvantages for mentoring include:

Feeling of resentment – If the mentoring is not voluntary, then the mentor might have a feeling of resentment because he has to undertake additional responsibilities. This might prove harmful for the mentee as he might be on the line of fire and will have to bear the brunt of the mentor’s displeasure

Create conflict – The organization takes the help of several mentors, and this can ultimately cause conflict and create loyalty issues.

Issues with dependence – There is a high probability that new employees in the organization will become highly dependent on their mentor’s support and advice and that it will become problematic for them to walk unaided later on. When such a situation occurs, it is the organization that suffers as it hampers its level of efficiency and productivity. Moreover, the workers will continue to struggle and without mentor will not be able to handle the pressure of the workplace

Additional expenses and loss of time – Mentorship may cost money to some, the programme itself costs time, effort too and is often an additional expense that nobody wants to bear.

ON A FINAL NOTE . . . .

Mentoring is all about empowering and motivating the mentee so that he can identify the issues and resolve them admirably as per his satisfaction

It is not about holding his hands and taking him to the end post but showing him that different ways can help him to achieve his goals. Mentoring is not therapy or counselling but building a relationship for future growth.

Good luck in all your endeavours.

As of old: Be EMPOWERED and EXCEL!!!

VOCABULARY WORKSHOP – THE KEY WORDS TO USE IN WRITING OR SPEAKING COMPETENTLY 6

The acquisition of vocabulary is one of the most important tasks in language learning. If you have enough words, you can make sense of what you are reading or listening to and you can somehow express yourself.

In short, vocabulary acquisition is much more important than grammar. The grammar we have is acquired gradually as we become familiar with the language, with the words, but first of all we need words.

How Do We Learn Vocabulary?

Vocabulary knowledge is not something that can ever be fully mastered; it is something that expands and deepens over the course of a lifetime. Instruction in vocabulary involves far more than looking up words in a dictionary and using the words in a sentence.

Research argues that knowing a vocabulary word in the target language is the ability to:

  1. recognize it in its spoken form.
  2. recall it at will.
  3. relate it to an appropriate object or concept.
  4. use it in the appropriate grammatical form.
  5. in speech, pronounce it in a recognizable way.
  6. in writing, spell it correctly
  7. use it with the words it correctly goes with, i.e. in the correct collocation.
  8. use it at the appropriate level of formality.
  9. be aware of its connotations and associations.

Now, the strategy that you adopt will depend on your personal preference and also, in my view, how much time you have.

One thing that has helped many of my students is learning more about synonyms, antonyms, and homonyms. Understanding these three phenomena leads to better comprehension, better spelling, and more expressive writing.

In each of the following groups, circle the item that means the same as the boldface word in the introductory phrase:

  1. A saturnine temperament A. gloomy   B. surly      C. ugly
  2. A fatuous comment:  A. perceptive   B. foolish   C. brief
  3. A paucity of resources:  A. abundance   B. scarcity   C. use
  4. Accused them of pedantry:  A. hairsplitting   B. treason   C. exactness
  5. A record of their peregrinations:  A. dreams    B. expenses    C. travels
  6. A paltry amount:  A. small         B. piddling        C. incorrect
  7. vituperative remarks: A. complimentary   B. brief     C. abusive
  8. a travesty of justice: A. misinterpretation  B. calculated   C. trial
  9. saturate the field: A. dry  B. soak   C. open
  10. cognizant of the problems: A. unaware   B. aware   C. proud
  11. a benign influence:  A. tireless   B. kind  C. cruel
  12. incarcerate the prisoner:  A. imprison  B. release   C. flatter
  13. an imperturbable manager:   A. excitable   B. skillful   C. composed
  14. unremitting efforts:   A. continual   B successful    C. recent
  15. performed like a tyro:   A. veteran    B. coward    C. beginner

ANSWERS: 1A  2B  3B  4C  5C  6A  7C  8A  9B  10B 11B 12A  13C  14A  15C

How did fair? Once again Dear Reader, with practice you will see your vocabulary improving so much: both written and spoken.

Another top tip: LEARN THE CULTURE. There are a number of different kinds of English around the world. British and American English might seem the same, but there are many little differences.

Also note that sometimes even native speakers don’t understand other dialects of English 100%, and that’s definitely true.

When you are learning new words, keep in mind which country you plan to visit, live in or work in. You should learn British English if you plan to go to England, American English if you plan to go to America, and so on.

The word color, for example, is spelled as “colour” in British English. British people used the words “brilliant” and “cheers” often, but Americans prefer to say “cool” instead of “brilliant” and “see you” instead of “cheers.”

Good luck in all your endeavours.

As of old: BE EMPOWERED and EXCEL!

VOCABULARY WORKSHOP – THE KEY WORDS TO USE IN WRITING OR SPEAKING COMPETENTLY 4

The acquisition of vocabulary is one of the most important tasks in language learning. If you have enough words, you can make sense of what you are reading or listening to and you can somehow express yourself.

In short, vocabulary acquisition is much more important than grammar. The grammar we have is acquired gradually as we become familiar with the language, with the words, but first of all, we need words.

Many Books

How Do We Learn Vocabulary?

“Because children with weaker vocabularies are less likely to learn new words from listening to stories than children with larger vocabularies, teachers need to provide more direct instruction for children with smaller vocabularies” – Robbins & Ehri, 1994.

VOCABULARY knowledge is not something that can ever be fully mastered; it is something that expands and deepens over the course of a lifetime. Instruction in vocabulary involves far more than looking up words in a dictionary and using the words in a sentence.

Vocabulary is acquired incidentally through indirect exposure to words and intentionally through explicit instruction in specific words and word-learning strategies.

There are two approaches I have implemented over the years:

  • One is the deliberate study of vocabulary by reading vocabulary lists or flash cards as well as keeping handwritten lists.
  • The other, is to learn through a lot of exposure – watching age-appropriate films, television documentaries or series;  reading novels, newspapers and magazines.

Now, the strategy that you adopt will depend on your personal preference and also, in my view, how much time you have.

One thing that has helped many of my students is learning more about synonyms, antonyms, and homonyms. Understanding these three phenomena leads to better comprehension, better spelling, and more expressive writing.

In each of the following groups, circle the item that means the same as the boldface word in the introductory phrase:

  1. a feckless assistant: a. dishonest   b. able   c. ineffective   d. meticulous
  2. substantiated his story: a. filed   b. validated   c. concocted   d. dismissed
  3. skillful temporizing: a. theorizing     b. miming   c. stalling   d. debating
  4. excessive verbiage: a. verbosity    b. coyness   c. silence     d. terseness
  5. utopian views: a. realistic    b. visionary     c. old-fashioned     d. scenic
  6. wrote a moving eulogy: a testimonial    b. sermon     c. account
  7. a devious manner: a. blunt   b. clumsy   c. shifty
  8. the invidious review: a. malicious    b. succinct      c. complimentary
  9. the distraught witness: a. impartial   b. agitated   c. unjust
  10. in the pejorative sense: a. favourable      b. disparaging       c. objective
  11. exhume the treasure: a. disinter      b. dig up       c. discover
  12. incarcerated the suspect: a. imprisoned      b. released          c. followed
  13. alcyon weather:  a. refreshing      b. turbulent        c. seasonable
  14. simply arrogated the role:   a. loathed      b. adored      c. usurped
  15. interrogate the suspect: a. imprisoned   b. released      c. question

ANSWERS: 1A  2B  3A  4B  5B  6A  7C  8A  9C  10B 11B 12A  13A  14C  15C

How did fair? Once again Dear Reader, with practice you will see your vocabulary improving so much: both written and spoken.

red heart on a old opened book

Lastly, . . . consider this:

Maths (British English) — Math (American English) 

In both countries, this is the abbreviation for “mathematics.” British people wonder why Americans don’t include the “s” and Americans wonder why British people do include the “s” It’s one of the mysteries of the universe and is another topic I shall pursue later.

Good luck in all your endeavours.

As of old: BE EMPOWERED and EXCEL!

VOCABULARY WORKSHOP – KEY WORDS TO USE IN WRITING OR SPEAKING COMPETENTLY (3)

Vocabulary knowledge is the single most important factor contributing to reading comprehension – Laflamme, 1997

SIMPLE WAYS TO EARN WIDE VOCABULARY

The core to earning a top grade mark in English Literature or Composition involves the mastery of an array of skills, chief among which, is using extensive vocabulary. This means students must never ever try to make their writing look more academic by using “clever” words for their own sake. Instead, always understand that there is a difference between a person’s passive vocabulary (the words one understands) and a person’s active vocabulary (the words one actually uses).

Ever Tried

LEARN THE CULTURE. There are a number of different kinds of English around the world. British and American English might seem the same, but there are many little differences.

When you are learning new words in English, keep in mind from which country your syllabus is coming from: the UK or USA . You should learn British English if your syllabus is from OCR, AQA or Edexcel and American English if your syllabus is from College Board or Advanced Placement, and so on.

The word color, for example, is spelled as “colour” in British English. British people use the words “brilliant” and “cheers” often, but Americans prefer to say “cool” instead of “brilliant” and “see you” instead of “cheers.”

A SYNONYM is a word or phrase that means exactly or nearly the same as another word or phrase.

In each of the following groups, circle the item that means the same as the boldface word in the introductory phrase:

  1. intermittent snow: A. irregular   B. uninterrupted    C. drifting
  2. A sylvan setting A. urban   B. rural  C. barren
  3. A moot issue   A. debatable   B. pressing   C. secondary
  4. Delivered a diatribe A. baby   B. tirade   C. newspaper
  5. Inane comments A. laughable      B. brief   C. sensible
  6. histrionic behavior : A. melodramatic    B. proper       C. subdued
  7. abrogate the treaty: A. ratify      B. sign   C. enforce
  8. Surprised by the perspicacity: A. shrewdness     B. betrayal      C. obtuseness
  9. an incongruous remark: A. courteous      B. jarring        C. lengthy
  10. a bucolic setting: A.countryside   B. neglected   C. urban
  11. exacerbate the injury: A. treat   B. report   C. intensify
  12. known for their idiosyncrasies: A. individualistic   B. intelligence   C. wealth
  13. a lackadaisical performance:  A. indifferent   B. energetic   C. unenthusiastic
  14. emulate the actress  A. praise     B. mimic    C. criticise
  15. banal lyrics: A. sentimental      B. trite C. effective

ANSWERS: 1a  2b  3a  4b  5b  6a  7b  8a  9c  10b 11c 12a  13c  14b  15c

How did fair?

Once again Dear Reader, with practice you will see your vocabulary improving so much in both written and spoken.

Good luck in all your endeavours.

As of old: BE EMPOWERED and EXCEL!

VOCABULARY WORKSHOP – THE KEY WORDS TO USE IN WRITING OR SPEAKING COMPETENTLY 2

Vocabulary is the knowledge of words and word meanings.

According to Steven Stahl (2005)

“Vocabulary knowledge is knowledge; the knowledge of a word not only implies a definition, but also implies how that word fits into the world.”

Vocabulary knowledge is not something that can ever be fully mastered; it is something that expands and deepens over the course of a lifetime. Instruction in vocabulary involves far more than looking up words in a dictionary and using the words in a sentence.

Vocabulary is acquired incidentally through indirect exposure to words and intentionally through explicit instruction in specific words and word-learning strategies.

At High School, I have many a time engaged CONTEXT CLUES to teach Vocabulary and it has been very effective.

Books RangeCONTEXT CLUES

Context clues are hints that an author gives to help define a difficult or unusual word. The clue may appear within the same sentence as the word to which it refers, or it may follow in a preceding sentence. Because most of one’s vocabulary is gained through reading, it is important that you are able to recognize and take advantage of context clues.

Thus, whether you are someone learning English as a second language or a reader who is trying to build their vocabulary, by knowing the different types of context clues, you may be better able to recognize and understand new words when you are reading.

Types Of Context Clues

There are at least FIVE kinds of context clues that are quite common:

1) RESTATEMENT/SYNONYM CLUES – Here, sometimes a hard word or phrase is said in a simple way. Notice how the meaning of the darkened word is arrived at:

  • Her animosity, or hatred, of her sister had divided the family.
  • Bill felt remorse, or shame, for his harsh words.
  • This situation is a conundrum – a puzzle.

2) CONTRAST/ANTONYM CLUES – Sometimes a word or phrase is clarified by the presentation of the opposite meaning somewhere close to its use. Look for signal words when applying context clues. Notice how the meaning of the darkened word is arrived at:

  • Emma had a lot of anxiety about the exam but I had no worries about it.
  • Marty is gregarious, not like his brother who is quiet and shy.
  • Instead of making risky decisions like his brother, George took precautions.

3) DEFINITION/EXPLANATION – Here the meaning of the unknown word is clearly given within the sentence or in the sentence immediately afterwards.

  • There is great prosperity in the country but many citizens are living in poverty.
  • There was a lot of tangible evidence, including fingerprints and DNA, to prove them guilty.
  • There is a 30 percent chance of precipitation, such as snow or sleet.

4) INFERENCE/GENERAL CONTEXT CLUES – Sometimes a word or phrase is immediately clarified within the same sentence. Relationships, which are not directly apparent, are inferred or implied. The reader must look for clues within, before, and after the sentence in which the word is used. The meaning can easily be inferred from the general context of the sentence or paragraph. Consider these sentences:

  • The team was elated when they won the trophy.
  • The cat has a kind disposition and would never bite or claw anyone.

5) EXAMPLE (specific types of the unknown word are given in the sentence. The unknown word is usually a non-specific noun. What is a beverage as shown in the sentence?

  • What type of beverage would you like? We have soda, water, lemonade, sweet tea and apple juice.

6) PUNCTUATION – Here Readers can also use clues of punctuation and type style to infer meaning, such as quotation marks (showing the word has a special meaning), dashes , parentheses or brackets (enclosing a definition), and italics (showing the word will be defined).

Notice how Punctuation is used in these sentence to define a word, haberdasher:

  • Tom’s father was a haberdasher, or men’s shop keeper, in the story.
  • Tom’s father was a haberdasher (men’s shop keeper) in the story.
  • In the story, Tom’s father was a haberdasher-or men’s shop keeper.
  • Tom’s father was a “haberdasher”. He had a clothing store for men.

I have compiled a list of English@High School High Frequency Word List through phrasal sentences in which a highlighted word is used. Your task is two-fold:

  • Firstly, master the context in which the word is used so that when you write you pick the right word and vocabulary.
  • Secondly, I have exercises on vocabulary with answers given at the end. Try the exercises first before getting to the answers.

Again, Dear Reader, this needs practice.

To make it manageable, I have fifteen words for each category.

girl writing on a black keyboardSYNONYMS

This is a word or phrase that means exactly or nearly the same as another word or phrase.

In each of the following groups, circle the item that means the same as the boldface word in the introductory phrase:

  1. eschew easy solutions A. shun B. avoid C. condemn D. embrace
  2. germane comments:          A. harsh   B. relevant   C. apt   D. recent
  3. a coherent account: A. lengthy B. humorous C. muddled   D. clear
  4. move with celerity:   A. promptness B. sluggishness C. furtiveness   D. emptiness
  5. a pejorative connotation: A. neutral B. favourable   C. ambiguous   D. derogatory
  6. overt hostility: A. concealed   B. open      C. unwarranted     D. recent
  7. a legislative gambit: A. session   B. right   C. plan   D. concern
  8. a myopic approach to the problem: A. farsighted      B. fallacious     C. conventional   D. shortsighted
  9. an avid jogger: A. elderly   B. injured   C. passionate      D. reluctant
  10. a devious answer: A. dishonest   B. roundabout   C. correct   D. incorrect
  11. nefarious practices: A. wicked    B. ancient      C. widespread     D. commendable
  12. a verdant landscape: A. rocky   B. green   C. arid   D. snowy
  13. an articulate speaker: A. forceful   B. halting   C. fluent     D. public
  14. decry our efforts: A. praise     B. criticize   C. study     D. notice
  15. a piquant charm: A. interesting     B. sarcastic   C. subtle   D. bland

ANSWERS: 1B  2B  3D  4A  5D  6B  7C  8D  9C  10A 11A 12B  13C  14B  15A

How did fair? Once again Dear Reader, with practice you will see your vocabulary improving so much in both written and spoken.

Good luck in all your endeavours.

As of old: BE EMPOWERED and EXCEL!

VOCABULARY WORKSHOP – THE KEY WORDS TO USE IN WRITING OR SPEAKING COMPETENTLY 1

The College Board’s SAT textbook has a 3 500 Basic Word List of which students must master in order to do well in their exams. The list is divided into High Frequency words and Hot Prospects. From this premise, the importance of vocabulary is highly accentuated:

  • “Without grammar very little can be conveyed; without vocabulary nothing can be conveyed.” (Wilkins 1972)

  • “When students travel, they don’t carry grammar books, they carry dictionaries.” (Krashen 1993)

The truth is that students need multiple and various exposures to a word before they fully understand that word and can apply it. They need also to learn words in context, not stand alone lists that come and go each week. Of course the way we learn words in context, or implicitly, is by reading, then reading some more.

pexels-photo-256417.jpegCONTEXT CLUES

Context clues are hints that an author gives to help define a difficult or unusual word. The clue may appear within the same sentence as the word to which it refers, or it may follow in a preceding sentence. Because most of one’s vocabulary is gained through reading, it is important that you are able to recognize and take advantage of context clues.

Thus, whether you are someone learning English as a second language or a reader who is trying to build their vocabulary, by knowing the different types of context clues, you may be better able to recognize and understand new words when you are reading.

TYPES OF CONTEXT CLUES

There are at least SIX kinds of context clues that are quite common:

1) RESTATEMENT/SYNONYM CLUES – Here, sometimes a hard word or phrase is said in a simple way. Notice how the meaning of the boldfaced word is arrived at:

  • It was an idyllic day; sunny, warm and perfect for a walk in the park.
  • Her animosity, or hatred, of her sister had divided the family.
  • Bill felt remorse, or shame, for his harsh words.
  • This situation is a conundrum – a puzzle.

So, what is a synonym? It is a word or phrase that has the same meaning as the unknown word and hints at the definition.

2) CONTRAST/ANTONYM CLUES – Sometimes a word or phrase is clarified by the presentation of the opposite meaning somewhere close to its use. Look for signal words when applying context clues. Notice how the meaning of the darkened word is arrived at:

  • Emma had a lot of anxiety about the exam but I had no worries about it.
  • Marty is gregarious, not like his brother who is quiet and shy.
  • Instead of making risky decisions like his brother, George took precautions.

3) DEFINITION/EXPLANATION – Here the meaning of the unknown word is clearly given within the sentence or in the sentence immediately afterwards.

  • There is great prosperity in the country but many citizens are living in poverty.
  • Some celestial bodies, such as the planets and stars, can be seen with the naked eye.
  • There was a lot of tangible evidence, including fingerprints and DNA, to prove them guilty.
  • There is a 30 percent chance of precipitation, such as snow or sleet.

4) INFERENCE/GENERAL CONTEXT CLUES – Sometimes a word or phrase is immediately clarified within the same sentence. Relationships, which are not directly apparent, are inferred or implied. The reader must look for clues within, before, and after the sentence in which the word is used. The meaning can easily be inferred from the general context of the sentence or paragraph. Consider these sentences:

  • The team was elated when they won the trophy.
  • During the demonstration, a skirmish broke out and the police were called to restore order.
  • The cat has a kind disposition and would never bite or claw anyone.

5) EXAMPLE  – This is when specific types of the unknown word are given in the sentence. The unknown word is usually a non-specific noun. What is a beverage as shown in the sentence?

  • What type of beverage would you like? We have soda, water, lemonade, sweet tea and apple juice.

6) PUNCTUATION – Readers can also use clues of punctuation and type style to infer meaning, such as quotation marks (showing the word has a special meaning), dashes , parentheses or brackets (enclosing a definition), and italics (showing the word will be defined). Notice how Punctuation is used in the following sentences to define a word, haberdasher:

  • Tom’s father was a haberdasher, or men’s shop keeper, in the story.
  • Tom’s father was a haberdasher (men’s shop keeper) in the story.
  • In the story, Tom’s father was a haberdasher-or men’s shop keeper.
  • Tom’s father was a “haberdasher”. He had a clothing store for men.

The Library

I have compiled a list of English@High School High Frequency Word List through phrasal sentences in which a highlighted word is used. Your task is two-fold:

  • Firstly, master the context in which the word is used so that when you write you pick the right word and vocabulary.
  • Secondly, I have exercises on vocabulary with answers given at the end. Try the exercises first before getting to the answers.

Again, Dear Reader, this needs practice.

To make it manageable, I have fifteen words for each category.

  1. Forced to abase herself – lower, humiliate
  2. Abashed by her admiration – embarrassed
  3. The storm abated – subsided, decreased
  4. Abdicated the throne – renounced, gave up
  5. Aberrant nature of . . . – abnormal or deviant
  6. Unwilling to abet – aid, usually in doing something wrong, encourage
  7. Abhorred all forms of . . . – detested, hated
  8. Abjured his allegiance – renounced upon oath
  9. Act of abnegation – repudiation, self-sacrifice
  10. Refused to abolish – cancel, put an end to
  11. An abominable act – detestable, extremely unpleasant, very bad
  12. Abortive attempt – unsuccessful, fruitless
  13. Abridge the novel – condense or shorten
  14. Absolved of his sins – pardoned (an offense)
  15. The teller absconded – departed secretly and hide

In the second batch I am working on synonyms.

A SYNONYM is a word or phrase that means exactly or nearly the same as another word or phrase.

writing-notes-idea-conference.jpgIn each of the following groups, circle the item that means the same as the boldface word in the introductory phrase:

  1. histrionic behavior : A. theatrical B. proper C. subdued D. strange
  2. abrogate the treaty: A. ratify B. cancel C. enforce   D. sign
  3. Surprised by the perspicacity: A. discernment B. betrayal C. obtuseness  D. foolishness
  4. an incongruous remark: A. courteous B. unsuitable C. lengthy D. scholarly
  5. An ephemeral success: a. enduring b. short-lived c. phenomenal     d. enviable
  6. Exacerbate the problem: a. aggravate b. alleviate c. ignore     d. discuss
  7. Recant her testimony: a. corroborate b. record    c. read back      d. retract
  8. Countermand a directive: a. revoke b. issue c. clarify    d. ignore
  9. Irrefutable evidence: a. tainted b. circumstantial    c. indisputable    d. dubious
  10. Amused by their badinage: a. excuses b. banter c. appearance    d. singing
  11. 11. banal lyrics: A. sentimental common C. humorous   D. effective
  12. tired of their carping: A. nit-picking B. antics C. excuses  D. incompetence
  13. an intransigent opponent: A. weak B. temporary C. versatile  D. unyielding
  14. arrogate a right A. desire B. waive  C. assume  D. defend
  15. a speech filled with encomiums: A. wisdom B. platitudes C. criticisms  D. praise

ANSWERS: 1a  2b  3a  4b  5b  6a  7d  8a  9c  10b 11b 12a  13d  14c  15d

How did you fair? Once again Dear Reader, with practice you will see your vocabulary improving so much: both written and spoken.

Good luck in all your endeavours.

As of old: BE EMPOWERED and EXCEL!

AMAZING DO-ABLE NEW YEAR RESOLUTIONS & OTHERS IN 2023

Happy New Year to you and your families. Can you imagine that we are almost at the end of January and February is reckoning. Do you seem tired and exhausted of it already? Why?

MONEY SAVING PLANS

My sincere apologies on digressing – I am not a money matters expert but sitting down with my Mrs on New Year’s day, we just started talking about money saving challenges available so . . .

If saving money is high on your list of New Year’s Resolutions, there is a simple way to ensure you have a nice nest egg at the end of 2023, without it, feeling too punishing.

Is your financial situation undisciplined, unrestricted, and impulsive?

THE 365 DAY CHALLENGE 

Apartment Therapy has unveiled a foolproof money-saving approach – the 365 Day Challenge, which could net you almost £1,500 ($2 023) over the course of the year by putting aside a small sum of money each day.

Every Sunday, you put aside £1, on Monday it’s £2 and so on until Saturday when you put away £7 before starting again at one the following week. This amounts to £28 ($38) per week, and £1 456 ($1 976) a year.

Because it’s a case of saving just a few pounds, the plan should not feel like too much of a burden day-to-day.

52 WEEK CHALLENGE

Anyone who’s searched for a way to save more money has probably heard of the 52 Week Challenge. It’s a way to slowly build up your savings throughout the year—you start by putting aside $1 on week one, $2 on week 2, and so on until you reach week 52, putting aside $52 that week. In total, if you follow the 52 Week Challenge, you’ll save $1,378 (£1 000) by the end of the year. Easy enough, right?

OTHER WAYS TO SAVE MONEY

Just saving loose change has persuaded many people that they are able to save.  And when they become convinced that they can save, they find other ways to build an emergency fund or save for other goals.

Establish your budget. Are you looking for an easy way to begin? On the first day of a new month, get a receipt for everything you purchase. Stack the receipts into categories like restaurants, groceries, and personal care. At the end of the month you will be able to clearly see where your money is going.

Budget with cash and envelopes. If you have trouble with overspending, try the envelope budget system where you use a set amount of cash for most spending. And once the cash is gone, it’s gone.

Don’t just save money, SAVE. There’s a difference between saving money and saving money for your future. So don’t just spend less, put the money you save into a savings account to plan for other expenses or emergencies that can leave you financially better off.

Save automatically. Setting up automatic savings is the easiest and most effective way to save, and it puts extra cash out of sight and out of mind. This means saving automatically.  As millions of savers have learned, what you don’t see, you won’t miss.

Choose something to save for. One of the best ways to save money is to set a goal: choose between a short-term and long term goals! Start by thinking of what you might want to save for—anything from buying a lap top to a vacation—then figure out how long it might take you to save for it.

Aim for short-term savings goals. Make a goal such as setting aside $20 (£15) a week or month, rather than a longer term savings goal. People save more successfully when they keep short-term goals in sight.

Save your loose change. An easy way to start to save is to collect your loose change. By being aware of the loose change around you and making a conscious effort to save it and gather it in one place, you will soon reap the rewards of your new saving habit.

Use the 24 hour rule. This rule helps to avoid purchasing expensive or unnecessary items on impulse. Think over each non-essential purchase for at least 24 hours. This is particularly easy to do while shopping online, because you can add items to your cart or wish list and come back to them a day later.

Treat yourself, but use it as an opportunity to save. Match the cost of your non-essential indulgences in savings. So, for example, if you splurge on a smoothie while out running errands, put the same amount into your savings account. And think of it this way, if you can’t afford to save the matching amount, you can’t afford the treat either.

Watch your savings grow. Check your progress every month. Not only will this help you stick to your personal savings plan but it also helps you identify and fix problems quickly. These simple ways to save money may even inspire you to save more and hit your goals faster.

Everyone has the ability to save. At America Saves, they say “Start Small, Think Big.” You can start with only $10 a week or month. Over time, your deposits will add up. Even small amounts of savings can help you in the future.

WHERE CAN YOU SAVE YOUR MONEY?

Keep a Cash Jar: Some people feel more productive, savings-wise, if they use cash. If that’s you, and you’d prefer to physically put a dollar (or however many you’re supposed to put aside depending on which day of the week it is) aside every day, try keeping a money jar in a place you’ll remember to drop cash into every day, like on top of your dresser—you’ll see it when you’re getting ready, so you won’t forget. At the end of the week (or month, if you prefer), just deposit the cash into your savings account.

Use a Money App: If you’d rather keep things digital then a money app like Qapital or Acorns will be of great help. These banks are a new way to bank that makes it easy to save and invest money for stuff that matters.

Qapital, for example, lets you set up automatic transfers in the same dollar amount every day, every week, or every month, and has the traditional 52 Week Challenge transfer rule. Always make your homework before committing yourself.

If you don’t mind remembering to put aside money everyday, you can simply transfer the dollar amount for that day into your account with your preferred app—think of it like a digital cash jar, no deposits required. Or, if you’d rather set it and forget it, you can simply set up a recurring automatic weekly transfer of $28, and let your money basically save itself. Minimal effort required, and at the end of the year, your savings account will be nearly $1,500 richer.

Enough of money matters, dear folks . . .

Lastly, whilst doing some chores, one of these chain whatsApp messages popped up. It read:

Welcome to 2023, The Year of Nothing – IF you do NOTHING.

This month’s most popular text trending on phones, WhatsApp, and Facebook inboxes is all about ‘Happy New Year or Wish you a prosperous 2023’. Now, thank you, but that is the most useless yet popular message all around the world.  It is not about wishes, it is about action!

Pastors will be busy dishing out all types of ‘messages of hope to their respective congregants, The Year of Breakthrough, The Year of Prosperity, The Year of Victory and whatever as their God tells them, but listen, 2023 is a Year of Nothing –  IF you do NOTHING! All the sweet sound messages will not mean anything until you do something yourself.

My message to you friends and folks is: PPP – Pray, Plan and then Pursue. God will only bless what you work on according to His will. Do not be religious but be realistic! Take action and do not keep repeating the same things year in and year out, yet you expect different results. Otherwise 2023 will be like 2017, 2016, 2015 or whatever or even worse. 2023 is just a number, it is not enough to just wish each other a happy one. It will not bring happiness unless you find something that will make you happy.

God has never rewarded idleness. Look at all successful people around you, they all had to do something, they never just waited and hoped. Set up your goals and then prepare, then take up appropriate action.

Do not fear failure. When you try and fail, be happy because you have just learnt one way of not doing things.

Listen to constructive criticism but do not underrate yourself. You are not useless.

Everyone who is normal in the world can do something. It is not about your government always, it is not about God always, it is not about your friends and relatives, it is about YOU. The old say as a man thinks, so he is.

Remember God told Abraham, ‘Look North, South, East and West. As far as your eyes can see, I will give you and your children that land forever!’ Here God was giving Abraham an open cheque. He says you can do anything as long as you believe. Only you, can limit yourself.

So folks, I pray for all of you that God opens your eyes so that you will see limitlessly in 2023.

I am not wishing you a happy 2023, I am praying for you, instead.

Walk in love, believe and be diligent in all you do. Start today, set your goals and move! WALK THE TALK!

Another chain message I came across read like . . .

2023 INSTRUCTIONS

  1. Do not be casual in anything you do. Put your best in everything you do. God does not bless mediocrity, average or break-even.
  2. Serve God like never before without looking at what people say. Look continuously to God who is the rewarder of your service.
  3. Sacrifice. The quickest way to turn from captivity is sacrifice. Sacrifice provokes God to act.
  4. Balance devotion and duty. Grace does not take away responsibility. Balance devotion and duty.
  5. Stay spiritually and visionary focused.

Again, I repeat: Welcome to 2023, The Year of Nothing, IF you do NOTHING.

Good luck in all your endeavours in 2023.

As of old: Be EMPOWERED and EXCEL

HOW TO MAKE OUR STUDENTS & CHILDREN DO ANYTHING WE ASK OF THEM

pexels-photo-3019261.jpegThis article is a hands-on piece of work. By the end of your reading, you will be on a new trajectory where interaction with our students and children will never be the same again. Before I delve into how our students and children can do anything we ask of them, let me introduce you to:

Excellent Ways To Instill Manners And Good Behaviour Skills In High School Students

which I wrote a week ago.

Hypnotherapist and neuro-linguistic programming expert Alicia Eaton has published a book entitled: Written Words That Work: How to Get Kids to Do Almost Anything. In her book she reveals three simple tricks that every TEACHER and PARENT should try through:

  • changing words we use to create drastic changes in behaviour
  • explaining and creating the illusion of choice and
  • creating leading questions.

These linguistic strategies that Eaton uses to influence adults can be adapted to create obedient little angels in our students and children. Hence, by understanding the power of language; parents, and teachers alike, can influence their children to do almost anything – no shouting, bribing and threatening necessary!

‘Language of Persuasion and Influence’

This is the method used commonly by advertisers and sales people to persuade us to do exactly what they want. A simple step like dropping the word ‘don’t’,  and saying ‘thank you’ before rather than after a request and structuring sentences to create the illusion of choice can all have profound effects when they fall on students and our children’s ears.

pexels-photo-277124.jpeg

10 Rules For Getting Young People To Listen

These are RULES meant to get our students and children listen to us first time and without a fuss. Try practising them and you will be amazed by the difference you will see in how you communicate:

  1. Always say what you DO want your child to do, and not what you DON’T.

‘Too many of us get stuck in a cycle of negative talk which quickly turns into nagging,’ says Eaton. Phrases like,

  • ‘Don’t leave your room in a mess’,
  • ‘Do you have to leave your shoes lying around?’ or,
  • ‘How many times have I told you not to push your sister around?’

are counter-productive.

‘We use negative talk and then we’re surprised when our children don’t do what we want them to,’ Alicia Eaton.

 ‘But,’ says Eaton, ‘they’re not mind-readers’ and suggests turning the phrases around into a positive to get more effective results. Phrases like

  • ‘Let’s leave the room tidy and put all the Lego away’;
  • ‘Shoes belong in the cupboard under the stairs’ or
  • ‘Let’s get our skates on and see if we can be early for school today!’

are more likely to get results.

Linguistic strategies used to put adults ‘under the spell’ can be adapted to influence children in everyday life situations.

  1. Create the illusion of choice

If saying, ‘Hurry up and get dressed for school’ doesn’t spur your child on, then Eaton suggests: ‘Nudge your child in the right direction by offering the illusion of choice.’

Pose questions such as,

  • ‘Which T-shirt will you be wearing this morning, the blue one or the red?’ or,
  • ‘Which one will you put on first, the trousers or the T-shirt?’

‘This pre-supposes that the child has agreed to get dressed and overcomes the impasse,” she explains and says that creating that element of choice can work wonders in many scenarios.

If there is reluctance to doing homework, Eaton suggests giving the child a choice of when to do the work, with a question such as, ‘Do you want to work on your school project today or tomorrow?’

Or if your child is being fussy at mealtimes you could ask, ‘Would you like to taste the broccoli or the carrots first?’

If they never let go of the mobile phone Eaton suggests asking, ‘Will you be leaving your phone on the hallway table or upstairs in the bedroom when it’s time for dinner?’

  1. Talk as if it’s a given that your child will do what you ask

‘The word “when” is often referred to as the most hypnotic word in the English language. It gently implies that something will be done in the initial instance,’ says Eaton.

Give your child the subtle message that the task ahead is a fait accompli (meaning already happened or been decided) by clever use of the ‘when’ word.

Eaton suggests phrases such as:

  • ‘When you’ve tidied your room, we’ll have some lunch’,
  • ‘When you’ve finished your maths homework, we’ll be able to go out to the park’ or
  • ‘When you’ve put your uniform on, we can go downstairs for breakfast’.

As you get better at this technique, try adding two presuppositions into the sentence.

  • ‘Car sales people often use this pattern,’ says Eaton. ‘They’ll say, “When we’ve been out for a test drive, we’ll come back and you can choose a colour scheme for the interior.”

You may not have even been asked whether you would like to take a test drive. You’re being gently pushed along the sales process.

According to Eaton the technique can be just as easily applied to influencing our children. At homework time, for example, try oiling the process by using two presuppositions. For example say,

  • ‘When you’ve finished your comprehension, you’ll notice how easy it is to learn those spellings’. 
  1. Create a linguistic connection between you and your child

According to Eaton, creating a link with your child in the language you use can be a powerful tool in increasing their inclination to listen.

Eaton suggests putting yourself in your child’s place and vice versa with phrases such as:

  • ‘I, like you, realise you have lots of choices in front of you’ or
  • ‘You, like me, realise how much easier it is to do homework with a tidy desk’.

‘The “like” pattern is useful for slipping into conversations and can boost your child’s self-esteem and establish rapport,’ explains Eaton.

‘It’s particularly useful if you feel your relationship with your child has become difficult.’

  1. Say ‘thank you’ before, rather than after

‘We’re used to thanking people after they’ve done something for us, but what about thanking before it’s been done?’ asks Eaton.

‘This often works well because children naturally want to please people, especially their parents.’

So next time you ask your child to wash their hands, come to the table or switch off the TV, quickly follow it up with a ‘thank you’.

‘It’s a great way to wrong-foot a child who was going to ignore your request,’ explains Eaton. ‘Once they’ve been thanked, they feel obligated to perform the task.’

Thus, thanking children before they have carried out the desired task will drive them towards carrying out the task.

  1. Always give your reasoning

Often we expect children to jump to it without really understanding the reason behind what we are asking of them.

‘By explaining why we’re asking for something, our request is more likely to be granted,’ says Eaton, who suggest simply adding a ‘because’ to every request will do the trick.

If the music is blaring, try saying:

  • ‘Let’s turn the volume down and start being a bit quieter because we need to decide what we’re going to do next and it will be easier to think of good ideas’.

If you need help with the shopping, try:

  • ‘Can you help me carry the shopping from the car because there are just too many bags for me to do them in one trip.’

“By explaining why we’re asking for something, our request is more likely to be granted.”

  1. Front-load your sentences

‘Front-loading your sentences with phrases such as ‘think about it’ and ‘listen’ sends a powerful suggestion to your child to do just that,’ says Eaton.

Try creating motivation by saying:

  • ‘Think about it. How good will it feel once you’ve finished your homework?’

Or add weight to your request using the ‘listen’ word, for example:

  • ‘Listen, here’s what I think needs to be done next’ or
  • ‘Listen, we need to quickly put our coats on or we’ll miss the bus’.
  1. Put a positive spin on moaning

Some children get stuck in the habit of complaining, but according to Eaton:

  • ‘You can help your child get in the habit of looking for solutions by reflecting or bouncing the statement back to them with a positive spin.’

If, for example, your child complains ‘I’m too hot!’, Eaton suggests bouncing back with something positive. She suggests:

  • Ah, you’d like to feel cooler. What would make you feel better – opening a window or removing your jacket?’

If they come out with something negative like, ‘I hate sharing a bedroom’, try spin it into a positive with: ‘What is it about having your own space that appeals to you?’

‘These responses result in less moaning, less complaining and are more solution focused,’ Eaton says.

According to Eaton, creating a link with your child in the language you use can be a powerful tool in increasing their inclination to listen.

  1. Use leading questions

‘Using leading questions is a useful language pattern that can help to take your child from a problem to a desired solution,’ explains Eaton.

Eaton suggests the following sentences as examples of how to put a positive spin on a problem and at the same time help your children feel part of the solution.

  • ‘So, you’ve been feeling worried about your exams – to make yourself aware that you need to do something more about them?’
  • ‘So, you’re telling me about how much you hated this year’s maths teacher – so you can begin to look forward to the new one you’ll be having when you go back to school?’
  1. Help your child stop using the ‘can’t’ word

Eaton believes the word ‘can’t’ is used too often in conversations and shuts out the possibility of achievement.

‘To get your child out of this habit, highlight that things can and do change, says Eaton.

‘Your child is changing all the time, which means not being able to do something is merely transient,’ she adds.

When your child says, ‘I can’t do maths!’ Eaton suggests turning it around into,

  • Ah, you just haven’t yet found a way to do that particular exercise yet’.

Or you could say:

  • ‘You completed the multiplication exercises and you just haven’t yet found a way to do fractions.’

‘The idea is to switch focus to talk about what your child can do rather than what they can’t,’ Eaton explains.

Help shift your child’s mind-set to a more open one of possibilities and make your life – and theirs – a little easier.

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We can all learn. We can all help our children become better citizens. We just had not thought deep about it. That time is now. Let us help one another. Thank you.

Good luck in all your endeavours.

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As of old: Be EMPOWERED and EXCEL!